I'm going to try to make this short (ha!) as time is of the essence. I just had to share what God is doing with me right now, because it is just so cool and exciting (and a little scary).
If you have read my blog or been a close friend, you have no doubt seen many changes in our homeschool and curriculum. It seems we are always changing something, doing something different, changing styles, etc. I mean ALWAYS! As I was working on our plan for this next year, I pretty much came to a plan that I figured was workable and included the academics that my children needed. Pete and I had discussed it at length and decided what would be good. All the while, I've been praying... and praying... and praying. Pete's been praying for me, for our direction, for our home, as well. And every morning I was waking up with an uneasiness in my spirit as I contemplated this plan. I just kept searching for what the "best" was for us and coming up with various plans, curricula, and ideas - although consistent were not really easing my spirit. Every morning I get up to do quiet time and I just say "Lord, I'm giving this to you." I have to admit that it usually takes a few days of me saying that and praying about it continuously before I actually completely release it.
Well, yesterday I think I completely released it. Yet, all of you (if you've known me for any length of time) have to know that my mind never stops and I have to be constantly working on something - so I progressed with our plan and just kept giving it over to God "if this isn't what you want for us, please show me what you want." So, last night I pulled up a website that I had found LONG ago - www.homeschooloasis.com because it is at this time that I just needed and oasis. I just needed a refreshing time. I re-read the article Help! I Need to (Re)Start Homeschool and I Have NO Idea Where to Start!" which I had read so many years ago. I had even ordered several of the materials for the course and even started it. But, like much of everything else in my life, I never finished, and wasn't really open to what God had for us in our home and homeschool. I had a way that seemed right (prov. 14:11-13), but now that we have been doing this for 8 years, I am realizing that my motives were wrong and that no curriculum is going to bring my children to where they need to be unless my heart is right in teaching them.
So, I read the article, and went to bed. This morning I woke up and I had that uneasiness again. I started working on my memory verse - II Corinthians 4:16-18, and it occurred to me that this verse was all about our homeschool - the outer man is decaying (academics will be gone!) and our inner man is being renewed day by day (do I have my children's hearts and am I leading them towards God to be renewed day by day?). Wow!
So, I just sat there and all these thoughts start coming to me in a slow and steady way, not rushing in, but in a quiet way so that I could take them all in. I really feel like God is showing me that I need to be renewing my mind and get a more complete understanding of His idea of how my children should be educated - instead of making a plan and asking Him to bless it (which is what I have been guilty of the last 8 years). In doing this, I know I will find refreshment and joy that has been lacking. I'm seeking the freedom that Christ brings!!!
So, in the midst of this, my children are going to continue on their math work, their copywork, and we are going to finish our Time Travelers Colonial Life study. I also grabbed a couple of books today at the library that were part of the Ambleside Online lists. No need to worry, they are still "doing school", but I am relaxing and resting in the fact that God has something big He is doing in all of us!!
One big thing that we are going to be working on is order and a routine for our day and good habits. We have been severely lacking in this area.
This is a bit scary for me as well, because I thought I had always found security in a plan, in a man-made schedule and plan for our homeschool. I finding that the reason we have never been truly happy and able to stick with something is because I have never really sought God in a real and mighty way for educating my children. His ways are so much higher than mine!