Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Get Real!

I was listening to Todd Wilson yesterday in the car. C13 and I were cracking up!! He was talking about Lies Homeschoolers Believe and he was pretty right on. He's funny, but he was speaking in a serious way about many issues that hit very close to home. He encouraged us to just "get real" with each other. He talked about how when we don't admit the good and the bad in our homeschools, we are a discouragement to other mom's who think we have it all together. And although I've experienced this on the side of being discouraged by someone who isn't real, I never thought that I might be guilty of not being real. So, I wanted to get real with you today, and hopefully you'll all still read my blog and want to be my friend - ha, does that sound like Jr. High or what?

I must clarify that while I'm about to divulge several "real" things, most of them I'm currently working on. I think there is a big difference in being "real" and being negligent.

I'm guilty of:
  • yelling at my children, sometimes several times a day.
  • being easily distracted and not following a schedule most days.
  • not "finishing" a curriculum in a couple of years - just keep plodding forward.
  • not cleaning my bathroom sink in a while.
  • absolutely abhoring the out of doors in the summer, so we stay inside and watch lots of movies. We'll have a pool this summer, so maybe it will be better?
  • spending too much money impulsively and then regretting it.
  • eating too much and exercising too little.
  • not having a quiet time everyday.
  • staying up too late for the simple fact that I'm indulging myself (tv, computer, or reading) and always saying that I'll do better and I never do for longer than a few days.
  • not making matching outfits for my children, although most of the time they are in clean clothes even if they have to get them out of the basket.
  • because of my lack of winning my children's hearts to myself, for nagging, for being inconsistent, and for not caring at times, I am dealing with some rebellion problems in my older children.
My children are very "real":
  • Because of switching curriculums so much, my 13 yo is still working on fractions. And even "realer" - I'm okay with that.
  • My 10 yo complains everytime she has to do the dishes (3x per day for the last 6 months). THIS IS ABOUT TO STOP - REALLY!
  • My 5 yo still drinks milk at night, in a sippy cup, in his bed, right before going to sleep.
  • My 3 yo whines A LOT about various things and runs around the house in his underwear.
  • My 1 yo is still nursing almost exclusively and although I'm probably supposed to be okay with that, I'm not. I really wish he would eat solids, get down to 2-3 nursings per day and sleep through the night. I'm just not willing to let him cry it out at this point.
  • And although you were probably hoping to see something here about how "real" my hubby is, the fact is that I see my own sins so much more than I see his, that it's hard to pick out his "faults" - now! About 6-7 years ago, that was not the case.
Everyday I'm thankful for God's grace and everyday I wake up learning to die to myself and live for Him. Everyday I fail in some aspect if not in several!

So, are you willing to "get real" with me. Remember - in order for you to be considered getting "really real", your "about me" list must be much longer than your children's. Getting real is about admitting where you fall short, not about where your children and husband fall short. We say it to our children everyday - you aren't responsible for what they do, you are only responsible for how you choose to respond.

And now, I think I've been very real and I'll try to sandwich this in to some other good posts, so it's not just "hanging out there"! LOL

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Tasha said...

Hmmm, something tells me, I don't have the time at this moment, nor your blog the space to Get Real!!! I can honestly say, I struggle and by no means can I ever make things look like "leave it to beaver"!!!
And when people ask me how I do it, work & homeschool, I'm quick to tell them my struggles, but also that it's worth it!

Anonymous said...

Can I simply say Thank You! I am the stay at home mom of two and one on the way...and most of the time I compare myself(darn near always lacking...)To other stay at home moms.
It is really nice to know that I am not the only one that loses there temper and yells at the kids.I have gotten to where I start and then stop and talk very very softly.(really hard to do!)
That I am not the only one with a bathroom sink(and tub) that isnt perfect daily.
Also my son who is seven...isnt reading as well as others thinks he should because I took the option of not forcing it on him. He just wasnt ready and wasnt "getting it" so I put it off for a month or so and came back.We did this for 2 years.(and yes I am okay with that,just get tired of the judgement.)
As a side note...I didnt "get" fractions until about a two years after I was married(21 or so)...Then it hit me and finally had the aduh moment.
So in long Thank you for being brave enough to be Real with us. Its very frustrating feeling as though everyone else has it all together and you are the "bad one on the block".

Daughter of the King said...

Found your blog via workboxes yahoo group. I wanted to say that I am new to homeschooling (will start in August) and your "guilty of" is talking to ME! I could probably add a few more when I have time to really think about it but I wanted to say thanks for being real. I am trying to improve myself in soooo many areas but as Marc Carrier from Values Driven Family says, "How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time!" So it is one step at a time but I will get there via the Grace of God! Thanks again!


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