Amazing website and giveaway

There is a huge giveaway over at The Modest Mom's blog. She has a whole new website, Deborah & Co. named after her mom. I thought that was really really sweet. Paige and I are loving looking at all the giveaway items because I haven't heard of a bunch of these companies. Since we are on this serious debt reduction plan, I can't really spend any more money, so I really hope I win - or Paige wins so we can share. :)

Video: Recipe Binder

I took this video a while back for a dear friend. I couldn't send it to her, it was too big. So I'm posting it here. Maybe it will be a help to you.

Update: I am going to have to replace all the dividers because the tabs keep falling out. All of them. Kinda frustrating.

Walk to Remember 2012

I have a lot of pictures, because there isn't a whole lot to say. At least not words that I can muster up.

In 1988 President Ronald Reagan declared October to be Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. Not that it was to be a month of collecting money to find cures. The reasons for losing babies in the womb and soon after are endless. The awareness is in the fact that these babies are loved and remembered by their families and friends. It's a time to reflect on their short lives and what they mean to us and how they changed us forever.

MEND (Mothers Enduring Neonatal Death) is an organization for families who have been or are going through these exact circumstances. It's a Christian non-profit group based mostly in Texas, though it seems they are growing, and they are on facebook for support. This event was sponsored by MEND and paid for by many businesses in the area. I didn't realize it, but they did one in Dallas and Houston on the same day. This was the 16th annual Walk to Remember in Dallas and the first time we have ever been involved.

Captions below photos to explain the progression of the afternoon.

Me (Mama) & the most amazing husband (Big P)

after check-in. 

Mom, C (16), Big P, P (13), B (8) below P, Kimbo, Brady (my BIL),

L (6), N (21 months), A (4), J (in the carrier, my nephew - 2 weeks)

There was a walk from the church to the field. Firemen in kilts

played drums and bag pipes. It was beautiful.

Some of the kiddos.

Daddy and N

Kimbo & Mom (we were freezing. The temp

had dropped and it was so windy.)

Each family received an ornament for each child they

had lost. One for our baby born/died April 6, 2007 and one for

Jaron born/died May 17, 2012. The walk was held 2 days

after Jaron's due date, which was October 4.

Every baby's name was called and each family got up to hang

their ornaments on this tree. The tree was covered with ornaments

as far up as people could reach. Most families who had lost multiple

children strung the ornaments onto each other and hung one

on the tree branch. It was beautiful and sad. 

Nicole Sponberg of Selah came and sang a couple of songs and spoke. 

She lost her son at 2 1/2 months (I think diagnosis was SIDS). She shared her story with all of us.

We then prepared for a balloon release. I think 1400 balloons were

filled in preparation of this event. Blue for boys, pink for girls, and white

if you did not know the gender of the baby. Each of our family

members got 1 blue and 1 white balloon to release. Some of

us wrote the babies name on the balloon and a little message.

Then we let them go. It was one of the most amazing silent statements

I have ever heard in my life. Our babies are loved and remembered.

We were near the airport, but this is where they have been doing

the celebration for years, so I guess it was okay.

There were many tears and smiles. It couldn't be helped.

I miss the babies I will never hold again, but will one day see.

If a picture is worth a thousand words....

... then this one is worth 2,000.

I announced our pregnancy a while ago and then morning/afternoon/evening sickness overcame me. I apologize for not keeping you all in the loop but, as noted by my doctor at my recent visit, I have become a survivalist! Cooking for my family, taking a shower, and keeping food down have been my goals.

On September 14th, we got the news of our lives! Something, that one might say, we never expected, but that isn't quite true. I'm so glad that I told a friend I thought I was expecting twins because otherwise, no one would ever believe this story. But, I assure you, it's all very true!

It seemed to me that I was sicker than usual, at least a lot more nauseated, though no vomiting at that point. I also seemed to be so much hungrier than any pregnancy ever before. I was hungry about every hour to hour and a half. Then there was just that gentle nudging from the Holy Spirit. No voice, no "prophetic sign", just a heart change. "What if it were twins?"

At any other time in my entire married life if someone would have told me that I would be a mother to twins, I would have run kicking and screaming out of the sonogram room. I would have panicked for months. Many a time friends would say, "oooh, I'm praying you have twins," and I would not so tactfully say, "pray over someone else's womb - don't pray twins over mine!" Twins were cute to look at and probably fun to dress, but I honestly could not ever imagine having a set myself. Ever.

But on May 15, 2012, the Lord began a big work in my heart and not long after, I began to long for twins. Honestly. I don't remember ever praying specifically for twins, but I just knew that twins would be such a miracle to our broken hearts. A baby to fill my womb again would be a miracle, but twins would be a double miracle!

I was sicker than normal. With my girls I would be nauseous and even sometimes threw up for days in a row, but this kind of sick was an unrelenting sick. Green - always. Hungry - always. Tired beyond the "normal for me" exhaustion of the first trimester. I couldn't get enough sleep and would wake up even more tired.

About 2 weeks before my first "real" appointment (I had gone in at almost 5 weeks to get the blood draw and get started on lovenox shots), I mentioned to Pete that I thought it was twins. He laughed at me. Like a good hearty laugh. Twins don't run in either of our families so there was no reason to believe it was true. He made little jokes about picking one and sending the other one back. But I was serious and he didn't believe me! A friend had texted me and asked me how I was feeling. I told her that I was really sick and thought it was twins. She added me to the list of her many friends who thought they were having twins because of uber sickness and "ha'd" at me. Paige believed me and she began to talk about twins.

Then on September 14, we were driving to my appointment and in my mind I was composing the email/text/phone conversations that would explain that baby A and baby B were perfect. It was like I knew we were having twins and was pretty certain of it. We had to drive separate because Pete had to go to work afterward.

In the sonogram room I laid on the table and the sonographer proceeded to put the goop on my belly and do her thing. And she was there no longer than 2 seconds before she said "we have a big surprise. There are two of them." I lifted up and looked at Pete (who had the deer-in-the-headlights look) and said "I TOLD YOU SO." He was in shock and said, "Really? (to the sonographer)," and to me, "how did you know."

While in the waiting room awaiting our call back for the doctor, all we could do was giggle. Such a surreal moment!

That was such a weird cycle month for me and I wasn't even sure that I ovulated because of the temperature spikes that I had. Looking back, I think what happened was that I ovulated twice and the babies have consistently measure 1-2 days apart.

I saw them again today. They were jumping around and so full of life. It was the most beautiful thing ever!

This is Baby A (further down in my pelvis). 

You can see his or her little nose very clearly. 

This is Baby B (higher up). 

He or she was a little jumping

bean so the picture is a bit blurry.